Homo Sapiens: We are Worriers (and Warriors)
by Doctor Laurence H. Miller on 05/20/12Frequently over the years, a young person between the ages of 6 and 26 has come to my office with the complaint of being overly anxious. They feel that something must be wrong; that they are the only young person out there with this distress. I believe it's a terrible loss for our young to experience "anxiety" as a sickness. We don't think someone is sick if they cry out in pain after placing their hand on a hot stove. Everyone knows we have five senses and "pain" is part of the "touch" sense. The ability to feel pain is crucial for us to properly care for our bodies. Otherwise, people would frequently be severely injured painlessly and not know about it until it was too late!
Likewise, to experience "anxiety" is to be aware that something very important, sometimes dangerous, is about to occur. Our body/mind is giving us a warning, before it is too late. Feeling anxious may be uncomfortable, but it gets us prepared and alert. Either we must face what's coming, or escape from it if we need to. If we "face it", we want to be at our best to succeed as we face whatever the challenge is. If "escape" is the right choice, we want to "clear out" fast and get to safety.
Let's look at a few examples of common "anxiety-provoking" situations:
A boy or girl would like to ask someone out on a date (Do kids still do that?). I would say it's perfectly normal and healthy for the asker to have sweaty palms, pounding heart, and possibly chills as they prepare to pose the invitation.
It's common to "feel butterflies" and be "charged up" before taking a final exam, or sitting for the SAT's.
Anyone who's ever spoken before a large audience or performed in dance, music or theater, has had a touch of "stage fright". That is, if they properly cared about how well the venture would turn out!
One is likely to be anxious before an interview for admission to a college. And, despite the joy of being accepted to that college, being dropped off at school by Mom and Dad to begin four years of study away from home will give most teens a major case of "butterflies".
One is likely to be more anxious if preparing to go into combat with the military. Most people would agree that there's something wrong with a person who feels no anxiety in that situation.
There is a classic fable of "the grasshopper and the ant". It's an August afternoon when the busy ant bumps into the relaxing grasshopper. Grasshopper asks Ant, "What's the big rush?" Ant explains that winter is coming very soon and he must prepare for the cold days when food will be impossible to find. But Grasshopper is not convinced: "But it's August! We've got plenty of time! There's plenty of food! Don't you feel that lovely warm summer sun? How can you even think of winter! You are such a 'downer'!" Needless to say, "in no time at all", months quickly fly by and Grasshopper comes starving to Ant asking for a handout.
Our ancient ancestors lived in VERY dangerous times. If we weren't "Ants", there was a good chance we wouldn't survive a cold, hungry winter.
We as individuals, are the descendants of SURVIVORS of those VERY TOUGH TIMES, which lasted for MILLIONS of YEARS. Those people had to be successful in THEIR environment. Successful at being born. Successful at living thru the first, VERY dangerous year of life (when about one half of babies would die). Successful at growing up to find the right mate (who likewise had to BE a survivor from a SURVIVOR family!) so ANOTHER generation could be born. And each of these "links" of generations MUST be unbroken for MILLIONS OF YEARS into the DANGEROUS PAST.
So, if we have to decide to err one way or the other (worry too much or too little), I think it's clear most of our ancestors were the WORRIERS. Or they listened to the advice of worriers and followed their lead. The overly relaxed "grasshoppers" and their families would be doomed. They were bound to die out from some deadly encounter for which they were unprepared. So they FAILED to leave "relaxed" descendants who would be alive today. In any case, as the great Darwin explained it, the worriers were "the fittest" for the wild world of our past, and so they did survive, and so WE came to be alive because of their "gift" of worrying, AND we inherited their DNA, including the genes for worrying about all kinds of stuff!
But anxiety does MORE than protect us from danger. Anyone who has participated in "performance" of any kind knows how good it feels to "just DO IT". The "kick" of competing in sport, performing music/dance or acting or public speaking becomes a "high" of sorts; exciting after the initial nerves pass and you realize you are "OUT THERE" and shining, sharing, sparkling, and doing something quite special! Without those "pre-game butterflies", it just wouldn't be as good!
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